Trying to Cover the Girls

As my search for the perfect job continues, I’ve been trying to accumulate a youthful, professional wardrobe for any networking events or interviews I may attend.

I own a few pencil skirts, although I try to avoid wearing them because they tend to look short on my 5’10” frame. I’ve also recently found tall slacks on sale at Gap and Victoria’s Secret , so I’m doing well in the bottom half department.

I bought cute little flats and took my mom’s conservative one-inch wedges to wear so I won’t intimidate anybody by adding to my height. (Don’t get me wrong. I love being tall and wear 4-inch heels often, but an old boss suggested I might be more approachable without them.)

So, when I put on my slacks and wedges, pull my hair back, throw on some simple earings, and add some mascara, I am ready to impress. But wait, there’s a little problem…Well, maybe not so little: Dressing my DDs professionally.

I tried to buy some basic button up shirts the other day. I left the store almost in tears. The shirts I tried on were either potato sacks hanging loosely and making me look like tent city. Or they made it look like like the girls were making a desperate attempt to escape the confines of my shirt. Given any chance they’ll explode out of there and make an impromptu appearance. No matter how nice the shirt looked on the hanger, my body managed to either slut it up or make it look like one of my grandmothers’s hand me downs. Is there no middle ground between Pamela Anderson or Kathy Bates?? I felt like Goldilocks stuck in a button-up nightmare:

This shirt is too BIG!!                                                                                This shirt is too small!